I am thinking, writing and speaking English as my first language for at least a decade. But I spent my childhood among russian-speaking people and I lived in russia (and Belarus) for that years too. Since I’ve migrated to Ukraine, I’m speaking mostly Ukrainian at home and with locals. But I’m struggling with the language, it’s too difficult for me. (However, I have some success, and most locals don’t even know I’m not from here.)
As the full-scale invasion started, many people reached to me with their concerns over my life and safety. (To each and every one I’m sincerely thankful.) Among many others, there were russian-speaking people, and people from russia too.
Well, just a few of them. For the context, I’ve spent years living in russia not only during my childhood, but also during my early 20s, as I’ve collaborated with many advertising agencies and other brands in Moscow. (I’ve been doing motion design for advertising, more on that in my Résumé.) I’ve like hundreds of people I do know personally, even if some of them briefly. Not many of them aware of my whereabouts, but some of them know. From those hundreds of people (it’s close to 500 people, so you would get the numbers), less then 5 people reached out to me, including my distant relatives (who are pro-war, btw).
So, there were russian-speakers among many of the people who reached me, due to my life in Belarus. As Belarus is de-facto a russia-controlled pupped-state, not an independent country, and it never ganed any independence since 1918…
Occupied by the Russian empire since the end of the 18th century, Belarus declared a short-lived National Republic on March 25, 1918 only to be forcibly absorbed by the Bolsheviks into what became the Soviet Union. Occupied by Nazi Germany, Belarus was retaken by Stalin’s Russia in 1944 and remained under Soviet control until declaring its sovereignty on July 27, 1990 and independence from the Soviet Union on August 25, 1991. It has been run by authoritarian PresidentAlexander Lukashenko since 1994. Under Lukashenko U.S.-Belarusian relations have remained at a low level, despite efforts with the European Union to set benchmarks for improving Belarus’ human rights and electoral practices.
— A Guide to the United States’ History of Recognition, Diplomatic, and Consular Relations, by Country, since 1776: Belarus
So, as Belarus is de-facto a russian puppet regime, and never gained real independence (from russia) in 1990’s, many of its inhabitants are either russians or russian-speaking people. Those peoples I know much more than russians, due to me living there for over a decade too, I’ve been studying at school in Belarus.
Well. I’ve started my Telegram-micro-blog in russian, and I gave the link to many people who reached out to me, explaining it’s easier for me to just post my news there, rather than writing to everyone ‘hey, I’m still alive!’. One local friend from Lviv asked why do I write in russian there? They don’t understand neither English nor Ukrainian, I replied. (I have a similar blog in English, but since it was in Telegram, not many English-speaking people I personally know is on there, most of them either on Meta’s plaforms, Instagram, Facebook, and WhatsApp.)
I’ve been posting in russian, even ignoring the fact I don’t read in russian, I mostly don’t write in russian and I don’t speak russian. And I’m doing my best to forget this useless overly-complicated so-called language.
It took me some time to realise that there’s nobody to convince to be on my side in russia, and people from Belarus, they understand Belarusian. I switched to Belarusian, and it was a way of improving the language skills for me (I barely know Belarusian language), and highlight the fact that I don’t respect russia and respect Belarusian (and Ukrainian) culture. It was a fuck-you to my russian subscribers, as most russian know no other language, and not willing to learn any other language too. (Use online-dictionary then, you idiot.)
As over time, most of my belarusian friends unsubscribed from my blog (due to the physical danger of having such a channel in your phone), I’ve switched to Ukrainian. It was a PITA to use russian, and slightly less annoying to write Belarusian (due to the iPhone having no auto-correct keyboard for Belarusian language). I keep that blog to this day and use it as a notepad, I just save some related content to be re-formatted for this website.
Starting late October 2024, I’m posting exclusively here, and I’m slowly migrating my content from there. The previous posts would be adapted, as originally I used the isntant messenger paradigm with not much text most times. Here, I’m free to post as much content as I’d like. Which I’ll do. So expect me to have a very long texts sometimes. So, either enjoy your readings here, or go away.
I thought of translating this website to other languages (because I can), but I think I’m not going to start with it. Maybe later, some day. I don’t see any value in translating into Germanic / Scandinavian languages (as most people in that area know English very well). And I don’t see any value in translating my blog to Ukrainian or Belarusian languages too. Most people in Ukraine don’t need my notes, they have even more first-hand experience of the war. People in Belarus don’t care too much. Some of them are stupid fucks (remember? I’ve said there are many russians in Belarus), others are heavily oppressed by the state terror. Still heavily oppressed, 5 years after the 2020 sham-election.
And russian language has its special place in this.
- On one hand, it could be valuable to show russians the other side of the story they’ve been told. But personally, I don’t believe it’ll work out. They’re different, they don’t give a single fuck. They’re orcs.
- On the other hand… well, as I’ve said, they’re orcs, and I don’t even want to auto-translate my posts to russian. I don’t want to see that language ever again. You miss nothing if you know no russian. Except fucking ballet. Otherwise, if you’d knew their language, you’ll understand that nobody in russia gives a single fuck about ballet. It’s just another weapon for a (sometimes stupid and naïve) westerner.
So, I think it would be valuable to translate my posts to other very popular languages. Maybe Spanish and Portuguese. Maybe French. Perhaps German. Chinese? (Well, I mean, Taiwanese.)
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